I Feel Like A...

The following is completely unpublishable, but suitable for the Public Record. A good source assures that the following is true:

• Many, many years ago, a leading Australian journalist at the time, fancied a colleague, a fellow female journalist, and proposed they consummate his feelings towards her. Deadlines being deadlines, the fellow journalist rejected his solicitations, and continued pounding away at the typewriter; whereupon Lothario suggested that he would be happy to consummate this act whilst she continued writing, as long as she adopted a conducive position for such amity. The amended request was also refused.
• At another occasion the same household name launched himself, with the aid of a few drinks, onto a table at a well frequented establishment in Canberra, and announced with vigour: "Who wants to fuck the smallest dick in Australia!"
• Despite these imputations, it is further alleged this wordsmith, who shares this lifestyle with a marriage, has managed to conduct the World Rooting Championships in his hotel room, as at least one Sydney Morning Herald cadet can attest.

My inscrutable sources provide a wonderful insight into the upstanding character imbued in those who chose to keep their integrity from the light of day.